11/13/18
Summer 1990
Routine: “A sequence of actions, regularly followed; a fixed program.” Merriam-Webster. Why in the world do we have to classify doctor’s appointments, chemotherapy, spinal taps, and throwing up for 24 hours a routine? Basically, a fight against cancer puts you in a routine you never imagined existed. We began to plan things around this routine. Salt Lake was such a big city compared to our town, so since it was summer time we would go shopping or sightseeing before we headed to the hospital. We were down there once a month so it was a little adventure. But then we would have to get in the car and drive to the hospital.
By this time we were going to the new hospital on the edge of town closest to where we lived. Salt Lake City is a large city and very spread out in the valley. From Evanston, we would hit the eastern side of the city first, right out of the winding, steep descent from Park City, and then travel a few miles north along the foothills. The large, new and beautiful Primary Children’s Hospital was such an upgrade from the older hospital with shiny floor-to-ceiling glass windows and multicolored murals on the walls. I remember some of the walls were made out of glass blocks to let in more light. It really was a nice place to go, even if the inside was filled with pain. I really dreaded this place. We were always greeted by a nice nurse who would do the routine weight, height, and blood draw from my broviac to test my white blood count. They would then deposit us in a pretty sterile room with colorful pictures.
Guess who comes in next? This cute little nutritionist; I can still see her smiling face if only it was on there for a minute or two. She would measure the fat on my arm and ask me how I was doing. She would then proceed to ask me what I had to eat that day, and then ask me if I was eating my fruit and vegetables at home because she was not happy with my food of choice before coming in. Did you ever have to sit at the table when you were younger until all your food was gone? I did, and the only thing left on my plate would be vegetables. I would sit there for a while until I could get up the gumption to get those things in my mouth without gagging them back up. As a teenager, it was not that bad, but my food of choice was never a vegetable. The nutritionist told us the very same thing visit after visit about how important it was for me and my health to be drinking lots and lots of water and eating “green leafy vegetables because they have so many nutrients for your body.” It was always followed with, “Broccoli and cauliflower are full of cancer fighting properties…” She would get me at broccoli. Nope, not going to have it. I could handle peas, green beans, corn, but come on, broccoli. If I heard that once, I heard it eighteen times; guaranteed. She was absolutely a saint and truly cared about me, and I really did try to listen to her words. Mom did too, and always had them available at the dinner table.
After she left, the doctor would stop in to tell me we were on schedule with the chemo because my counts were good. That was all it took for my spirit to fall to its lowest; like a weight had just been dropped on me. I knew once I got up off this bed I would have to walk down the hall to another room with another very flat bed with crinkly white paper. There were a few monitors in there and always a couple of nurses. I would have a spinal tap, and if they had not done so already, they would hook me up to fluid to get my body working to flush out everything. That is why the nutritionist wanted me to be drinking water. The quicker the chemo is flushed out of the body doing its job along the way, the quicker the recovery afterwards. After the horrible spinal tap, we would start the two hour chemo drip. Sometimes the nausea would start as soon as I would walk in the spinal room. The smell would get me going. Other times, I would not start throwing up until we hit the road or even at home. But nonetheless I would spend the next 24 hours in that state.
Although I would trade anyone, any day for anything but cancer, I embraced this routine for another chance at life. I may not have changed my eating habits to include the vegetables I needed; I actually stuck with tacos and burgers and chicken strips, I really did whatever it took to get better. I worked extra hard and said to myself, “You are strong, and this will be over soon.” This routine became my life. But my strongest routine should have included God. Each and every day He wants to spend time with us, and we should with Him as well. A popular chorus and verse says it perfectly. Matthew 6:33, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” He will bless us spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically. We just need to seek Him.
God Said Cancer 